User blog:Harris Wright/Beans

What Beans Are
Beans are officially labeled as a highly potent hyper addictive substance. Beans give no physical or psychological damage to the user and are even said to provide health beneifits. Beans usually come in metallic cans with either a picture of a bean or the word "beans" on the side. Beans are commonly stored in supply bunkers due to their everlasting longevity, and have even been put in SCP-119 for 999 seconds at power level 5 with no notable side effects upon consumption. Beans are a staple food of Earth and are consumed by upwards of 90% of all humans and 40% of all non-human animals, due to them being effected by the addictive properties of beans too.

Places That Make Beans
The two main corporations that produce beans are 'Beans.inc' and 'Beans.corp', and are in a very intense conflict with no side clearly losing. To tell apart which cans are from which buisness, you can look on the label on the can. Beans.corp has the word "beans" written on the side of their cans while Beans.inc has a picture of a bean printed on the side of their cans. Both of these corporations harvest beans via two different methods. The first method for obtaining beans is mining for them, scavenging the underground to find condensed ancient plant matter from before the creation of the earth which can be easily and quickly processed into beans. The second method, which is arugably faster, is to to rob and murder angels for their precious beans, the higher ranked the better. This method is very widespread and has become the go-to method for making beans due to it producing superior beans more quickly, although it is frowned upon by the Christian part of the ~10% of the population that do not consume beans.

Golden Beans
Golden Beans are the most prized posessions of all. They can only be obtained in the very core of the earth or by murdering and robbing an angel with a total amount of wings greater than 13. People commonly commit mass homocide in attempt to obtain Golden Beans or steal them from another human, although non-human animals do this too. Golden beans are so rare that the effects of consumption have not been documented.